Facebook Memories

I love Facebook memories but they can confront. Particularly when they’re reminders of sad times and the loss of loved ones.  At other times I sit and shake my head and say to myself, “What on earth was that about!” This morning a photo of Richard (one of my favourites) along with this message popped up in my memories feed. 

“It’s been 15-weeks today since Richard passed away. It was close to this time in fact around 9:35am. I still can not believe that he won’t be back. But at least I have lovely pics like this to remind me of him. He was never happier than sitting in the pub on a chilly winters days in the company of friends & family.”

Do you know the lovely thing about this? I could look at that photo and read what I wrote and not burst into tears. I smiled and had a silent chuckle about that day at the Still & West in Old Portsmouth. 

In 2016 when people told me that would happen I never believed them. But it does. It’s doesn’t mean the hole left in a heart ever mends. I doesn’t. But, at some point you find a place of peace, the pain eases and you give thanks for the happy memories. For me (thankfully) there were many. That is why creating happy memories is so very, very important. 

Sanober Khan wrote in the Turquoise Silence. 

Some winters will never melt

Some summers will never freeze

And some things will only live in poems.

And for some of us some things will only live on in memories. Treasure them. 

This Is NOT OK!!!!

The Australian’s Greg Sheridan wrote a powerful piece today. They headed it “In face of racist terror, we are all Muslims today.” 

The mere reference ‘we are all Muslims today’ inflamed many. Despite it being a reference to solidarity. As a result, people ignored the key points. That is all too often the case today. 

Greg Sheridan said, “You get attention on the net by being more extreme, more emotional, more foul-mouthed, than the next fellow.” That comment is true, and it should concern all of us. The change in many people over the years has been stark. People who were engaging and polite are now some of the most abusive and foul-mouthed I’ve come across. The level of hate expressed is alarming the tribe behaviour most times out of control. I can understand how nutcases like Brenton Tarrant prosper in environments like that when I see ordinary people (mums, dads, grandparents) being turned into hate-filled abusers. 

I read Tarrant’s manifesto last night. I don’t believe he was the original author of much of the content. It appeared obvious he’d cut and pasted a lot. but, it was chilling reading. There are people out there who would be motivated to act based on what he posted just as the words of others inspired him. It’s terrifying. 

Far too often the words used to describe mass murderers becomes the key focus rather than dealing with the actions. There was a comment posted thanking Greg Sheridan for not referring to Tarrant as a right-wing extremist unlike and to quote, “our unintelligent Prime Minister did.” These same people erupt when Muslim terrorists are not named Muslim terrorist or extremists. Well they can’t have it both ways. It’s obvious Brenton Tarrant is a far-right extremist. Well done to the Prime Minister for saying that. We have to get our heads out of the sand and deal with the reality. 

Every time something like this massacre happens we say let their deaths not be in vain. Every time we say something has to be done but nothing ever changes. Why? Because it’s people who spread hate and division. The questions we never ask as a society is why people think it’s OK to behave like a pack of foul-mouth feral animals on the Internet? What impact is this behaviour having on the mental welfare of people? Why as a society are we not standing up on mass and saying this is NOT OK!!!

Animal Totems: The Spirit of the Kookaburra

When we lose someone close to us, in particular our partners, it’s only natural we look for signs. Signs that their spirit is still around and watching over us.

I’ve always believed in signs but now they have a much deeper meaning for me. I’m blessed to have received many. Red Robin’s are synonymous with signs and many speak of Robin’s in a garden as messengers from the spirit world. Alias where I live, we don’t have Robin’s but I am blessed to have many birds in my garden among them six Kookaburra’s. These are four of them; Mum, Dad and two adorable kids.

Now my garden is well established my Kookies spend most their day snacking on the many delights on offer; insects and worms. My garden offers them both a haven and an abundant feeding ground. But I also receive something in return. Perhaps the stories of old explain why.

Aboriginal legend says the kookaburra’s infamous songs of laughter each morning is a sign for the sky people to light the great fire that illuminates and warms the earth by day, the sun. King Kookaburra is a sun god of sorts and bursts with male energy. There is an opposite element assigned to the kookaburra as rain and creeks become the Kookaburras day spa they love the water.

With fire and water at the heart of the kookaburra’s spirit, this animal totem is a powerful one, bringing change and sentimental memories to the forefront of our lives. The kookaburra is a healer, a healer of the past, helping to close and open new and old doors in our lives. He is not the bringer of change but the orchestra to accompany you on your new journeys of the self.

The grief journey is the loneliness journey many of us will ever have to take. I find a level of comfort to think my beautiful little Kookies are accompanying me on my journey. I feel it’s fitting they call my garden their home.